At the Zoo

We go to the zoo often. It is actually a joke amongst friends because it seems like we go a lot. But really, we have a pass and live 10 minutes away, so why not!

Usually if I go alone with Kirsten I try to make it through without having to carry her and push the stroller. We mostly visit the animals, eat lunch, then leave. But this time I got brave and took her out of the stroller a lot to see the animals up close. Previous trips it seemed like she barely saw the animals, or really had no interest. This time... she loved it!

Something that a place like the zoo teaches be each and every time is patience. It isn't easy to navigate an entire zoo with a 17 month old by myself. I see a lot of frustrated parents, and frustrated kids, and I always pass them and think, "I hope I never act this way." When in reality... I will. We all have our days and I can't judge them based on one small experience. My kid won't be good every time we go, nor will I always have the patience to deal with her in the 80 degree heat and crowds of people. But I hope I remember the fun days like these, when things were easy, and know that for every good day, we have a pretty kick ass day too.

Holding Hands

Kirsten has just learned how to walk while holding our hand. She does some independent walking but nothing that takes her from Point A to Point B. It is more, "oh this is fun!" and then she realizes that she can do what she always does (crawl) to her destination.

We discovered she can hold our hand and walk last week at the park. She went down a slide and I ushered her off of it by holding her hand, and she didn't let go! Normally she will bat my hand away, insisting she can do everything on her own. But this time she held on and took a few steps with me. It was one of the best moments I ever had with her.

She continued it a few days later at the pool. I stayed at the bar waiting for our check from dinner while Todd took her to the docks to see the boats. Her put her down and walked while holding her hand. I look down off the deck and see them walking, hand-in-hand, in the sunset. Again, magical.

I only just started holding her hand, and getting her to trust me to walk with her, when it all came crashing over me like a wave.

This happened....



We went out to dinner and decided to walk by the fountains afterwards. Todd held her hand and slowly walked her up to water as it shot out of the ground. She loved it. She shouted, "doggy!" as a big Pit Bull galloped through the fountain. It was a great end to a nice dinner.

Not wanting to be left out I took her hand and walked her around. My little girl, holding my hand, as we walked around in our pretty dresses. I loved it. And then a small girl with a pretty dress on came over. She was hesitant at first, but then I noticed her reaching for Kirsten's hand. She then hugged her, and we thought it was the sweetest thing. After a good "you are my new best friend" hug she reached for her hand again.

And this is where it gets me.

Kirsten took the girls hand and dropped mine.

Dead. Over. Heart smashed. I looked at my husband and he had a look of shock on his face. I was witnessing two things... Kirsten's first real friendship (even though it only lasted the moments we were at the fountain) and the first time she didn't need me anymore.

I spend every day with her. It is just us girls and I love it. We go shopping, to the pool, we watch movies, and I sneak her cookies before her nap. We have a bond.

Seeing her drop my hand made this whole "growing up" thing more real for me. Eventually this will be the norm. She will think it isn't cool anymore to hold her mom's hand. Or be seen with me. Or wear a pretty dress to dinner with me.

I was just hoping that day wasn't today.

(slightly) Wordless Wednesday

"Cancer sucks!"
Karen Wheeler
dear friend, and best cancer-butt-kicker I ever met



Photo taken after we completed the 3 mile walk for the Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure

Memorial Day Weekend

After weeks (actually an entire month) of rain here in Pittsburgh, it was such a welcomed break this weekend to see some sun!
We celebrated by taking Kirsten to the pool!

Here is our weekend....







It is pretty amazing to see how far we have come in a year. Last year at the pool we carried bottles with us, and someone had to constantly hold Kirsten in the pool. Now she plays independently in the baby pool, walking right past us and up to the kid with the best toys. I was able to enjoy a cocktail while catching some sun, completely unheard of last year. I could see her making friends, and growing up there, and making childhood memories, just as I did when I was a kid. My favorite summer memories take place at the pool we went to every year. It is really amazing to see summer through the same eyes my own mother had years ago.