My non-Wordless Wednesday post

In response to this article and news story... Follow the link

I have probably written this post 1000 times. As well as other bloggers. It is just an issue that keeps rearing its ugly head, and we are constantly forced to defend ourselves.

Recently J.Crew came under fire for putting an ad on their site that showed a mother playing with her 5 year-old son. They looked happy and sharing a great mommy/son moment. The issue people had with it though was that the mother was painting her sons toe nails pink.

The horror!

J.Crew thankfully declined to respond to this backlash, stating that they feel it is a "non-issue." And I have to 100% agree with J.Crew, what is the issue here?

I am trying to figure out what the story is, what's the big deal, why did I spend 10 minutes of my day reading articles of this today?

Stories like these make me sad. It makes me sad because I feel like, as a parent, we are constantly asked to defend our parenting styles. Why did you choose to not breastfeed? Why don't you cloth diaper? Why did you use meds while giving birth? Why don't you sleep train your kid so she sleeps at night? How much tv does your kid watch in a day?

We are constantly trying to make issues out of things that are non-issues.

I went through so much anxiety and stress after having Kirsten because I felt like everything I did was wrong, and I only had her for a few weeks. I felt like a huge failure and she had yet to turn one month old. I failed at breastfeeding and I felt really ashamed about it. I couldn't go to my favorite online sites because I feared judgement. When I did confess on a few sites that I had to give up breastfeeding because it was just way too stressful, I got a lot of flack for it. I cried for days. I even lied to a lot of people and said that I had an easy time with it and everything was going well, all because I wanted to feel like I was doing a good job at being a mom, when it reality it was just the opposite. It took me a long time to come to terms with the type of mother I was, the type of mother I naturally had to be because that is who I am, and just because someone tells me something is "better" doesn't make it right for me and my daughter.

So why do we do this to people? I can only imagine the amount of stress on a parent of a child who chooses to dress differently. All because WE put that stress on the person. People want these news stories so they can sit around and discuss how if it was their child they wouldn't allow it. We need to validate ourselves and our decisions, so picking on those who are different is the easiest way to get our fix. WHY??

I love the response from a parent to this article stating that we should raise our children so that they grow up to be loving parents. We all want our kids to be happy and following a good path, but I really never thought that I really just want my kid to treat her kids with as much love and kindness as I treat her... and as my parents treated me.

So is this an issue? Non-issue? Or is the only issue here that people just need to mind their own damn business??