Back to Work

Well it was bound to happen at some point, I am officially back to work. Every mom dreads this part of parenting, the part where you have to let go of your little one and go back to the real world. The time before this was all puppies and rainbows, well for the most part, and my world consisted of baby and her needs. Now, I have work to think about, and dealing with passing her off each morning.

I believe I handled it perfectly fine. I got up at 6am and didn't bother to shower just in case it made me late. I got Kirsten all ready to go, bag packed, and nestled her into her car seat. She cooed and smiled at me as I buckled her in, and I felt a small bit of pain in my chest. Oh man... this will be so hard!

I took her to the sitter and explained all of her needs. How to feed her, that we are starting a new formula, how to change her, what she likes, how she likes to be bounced and played with... as if she has never taken care of a baby before!

She very happily accepted Kirsten into her arms and the other child at her daycare screamed in glee as she saw the tiny baby. I knew deep down that she would have a good time, and be in good hands, but that didn't help my anxiety.

What if she doesn't know how to settle her the way she likes it? What if the kid hits her? What if she falls off of something? What if What if What if!!!!!!!!

I had to tell myself to calm down. Kirsten was growing up and I needed to let go. I always said this would be easier if she was older, because I would see her run off to play and be so happy with the other kids. But as a baby, she has so many needs and I am still figuring them out. So it made it so much more difficult.

But I welcome the routine... maybe it is what we need in our lives. No more days of napping when she does, watching morning talk shows, and staying in sweatpants until noon. sigh....