Not the mama!

I chose this title because I wanted other moms to know that they are "not the mama!" of my child!

Okay so maybe a little bit more information before I completely go off track. I am a constant fixture on the message board on thebump.com and love to post photos of my little baby, attention whore myself and my fantastic post-baby bod, and reply to people's questions about their babies. We have fun, there is constant drama, but for the most part it is a nice community of ladies who are just trying to figure things out like me.

To go back a tad further, I decided to take out the Jumperoo and allow Kirsten to use it. I am an educated young woman and fully understand that toys such as these are not exactly meant for babies of 7 weeks, however, she has shown that she has some awesome head control, I inspected the toy beforehand and saw that the back was really high for her little head, and really, moms are always just looking for something new to stick their kid inside! Why else are there soooo many carriers and wraps for babies???

Anyway... I put it together and loved it from the moment I saw the finished product. This thing is huge but wow is it cute and fun!! I was beyond excited for Kirsten to wake up so I could put her inside and watch her little face light up (or at least I was hoping for this outcome). She eventually woke up, I fed her, and then it was show time! We placed her gently inside and she at first had no idea what to do with herself. I placed a pillow under her feet so she could bounce it on her own, and made sure she was fit snugly inside. All was clear!

I helped her bounce around and moved some of the toys. Her eyes darted from side to side and she took in her new space. This was an obvious success. After 5 minutes she was over the toy, as most children are, and I took her out.

I was so proud of my accomplishment and was pumped to show off my little girl to my favorite message board of mothers. I posted a photo and told them about how well she did, how supported she was, and that she enjoyed it for only a few minutes. Well, let the flaming begin! I really had no idea that people would get so angry about me putting my baby inside the Jumperoo!! Honestly, they were attacking me and making it out as though I placed her inside a 450 degree oven, hoping she would obtain the perfect beach tan! I was honestly shocked and surprised by the reaction I had received. Granted, a few mothers stood up for me, and I greatly appreciated it, but my feeling were already hurt and I felt like I had done something majorly wrong.


I suppose the point to me writing about this is that I was upset not because they flamed me for using a toy that is not exactly meant for a 7 week old baby, but in the way that they did it. Mothers tend to be extremely defensive about their parenting choices, and they want the world to know that THEY discovered the Holy Grail of parenting, and everything the rest of us does is just flat out wrong. I discovered this while pregnant, and how everyone had an opinion about my pregnancy, from what to eat to how much rest I should be getting or how I was carrying the baby meant it would be a certain gender.
We are constantly bombarded with images and information anymore about what is safe for a baby and certain styles of parenting. I think it has caused mothers to become these parenting Nazis. They think that going by the book is the only way, or following rules completely is the best way to go. Sure, it is for the most part the best way to go, but how on earth will a child ever have any fun if we just go through life following the rules?

This all reminded me of the time I was babysitting and took the little girl to the mall to play. The mall is such a hub for mothers it is amazing. We were all sitting along the edges of the play area watching the kids play when one mother's child came over and said she sneezed in her hands. The mother reached in her bag and got out a small bottle of hand sanitizer. Makes sense right? I was impressed that the girl didn't just wipe her hands on her pants! Well, another mother came dashing over and snatched the bottle out of her hand and screamed, "THAT HAS ALCOHOL IN IT! IT ISN'T MEANT FOR CHILDREN!" I nearly died! What in the would was this mother thinking making a scene like that? It made me so angry that she felt the need to make such a big show over something so small. The mother of the girl knew what she was doing. She wasn't allowing the girl to chug the entire bottle, she simply wanted her to have clean hands!

My point is, like in my previous post, trust your instincts. If you think your baby will be okay inside a Jumperoo for 5 minutes, go for it! Only you know what is best for your baby, not even another mother can tell you what to do.